Today, I got out of work in the afternoon and dropped in to my regular beauty salon. My favourite girl (ok…this sounds corny, but she really is a doll!) is tending to one young metrosextual male with blonde streaks (I guess only males are called metrosexual…whoever heard of metrosexual women?) She smiled and asks me to have a seat and wait for a while as she was in the middle of a manicure session. I curse myself for not taking an appointment as I carelessly flip through the latest copy of Femina.
As I look around, there’s this young girl all of 5, having an adult dialogue with the attending hairstylist while the mother watches with pride. Now, don’t get me wrong. I have a huge thing for little girls. They melt my heart and make me desperate for a daughter despite the small issue that a man is required for the process. However, this one is really cute and she knew that. She had sweet-talked the salon girl into putting strawberry nail paint for her. I watch them leave with mixed emotions. At her age, I didn’t even know nail paints existed. But maybe she will grow up more confident than I am even at my age.
Lost in thought I watch a familiar figure loom close. I reluctantly manage a smile.
“What are you doing here?” she asks. Her tone overtly patronizing.
This lady is an old acquaintance. I don’t know her enough to hate her but I know enough to avoid her company. Coming back to her question, what does it mean?
- She doubts whether I can afford this?
- Am I too ugly for this place?
- Did I ever sign a contact with her not to use the same salon?
I run through possible answers in my head.
I come here to letch at the men.
I am an apprentice here.
Ohhh My God! I thought this was the library!
I loveeee the music they play!
“I am doing a sex survey.” is what I finally say with exaggerated politeness.
The metrosextual is clearly smirking. The lady at the counter tries desperately to hide her smile. At last, Her Highness gets it. Turns and leaves without a goodbye.
It must have been my smile.
Now, you can call me a bitch, but my tolerance for inanity is close to zero.
Do you think I need help?