His absence in her life is now permanent. His silence, his indifference, his deceit are now routine. But she can’t forget those moments. Transient yet stark. How he would always call her when he listened to that song he knew she loved. How she had often required his undivided attention and he had always obliged. How in moments of passion she demanded and he provided. Little acts of kindness. They sear her soul. Some days she wishes these moments weren’t ever there. It would be so much easier to erase. On other days, she is glad for those moments. Proof of her ability to love another. For if not for those moments, she would have convinced herself that she was incapable of it. Finally, he hasn’t left her bitter. She hasn’t lost her faith in humankind. For that alone, she has forgiven him and that leaves her in a sense of peace.
6 comments:
Sometimes "She" surprises herself, the kind of thoughts she gets and decisions she makes is so unlike her, the memories that bring her happiness, memories that bring back even more memories, are so unlike the ones she would remember.
The other her has opened her up, made her more stronger, strong enough to let go, let go the imperfection, and concentrate more on the perfection.
Hey I keep doing this, writing my feeling of what the person I make out the blogs I read, i am very sorry if I have tried to snoop into some thought which is very personal.
Rambler : We battle all the time with the images we form...we make, then we break and then we build again..and let go we must....life is like a fist full of sand...more we tighten our grip, more it escapes...cest la vie :) Thank you for dropping in...
Well my way of looking is forgiving is never a proof of ones ability to love another. Deceit can never be forgiven. If she still chooses to do so, well, bless her!
SJ : the ability to love is a gift...
'Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.'
He comes back to her and says hello, she responds but fights back and then again responds and the saga continues . He loves her for what she is and not for what she has done ....is this another part of the saga .....
niladri: if you must, write your own saga.
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